Yup, still a girl.

I'm going to go ahead and warn you all right now that this post is going to remind you that I'm just like every girl you know. Sorry to disappoint.

But what the HELL is going on with the scale? I hate it so much my eyes could bleed. No matter what I do, the number does not decrease. If anything, it increases.

I try really hard not to care, but I care. I try really hard to do what everyone says and base my self worth on how good I feel and how well my clothes fit, but I DON'T. I'll have you know I feel great and my clothes fit swimmingly, but WHY IS THE NUMBER SO HIGH?

I stepped on the scale before my run tonight. I even took out my ponytail for the event. What? The rubberband could add unnecessary weight! And, sure as shit, the number was a few pounds higher than it was the last time I checked.

My weight constantly fluctuates in an eight-pound range. Like, one day I'm one weight, and the next day I am four pounds lighter. Or heavier. Up and down. Constantly. I'm currently on the up, and it makes me feel vicious. Who can I hit for this?

Does my body not know how much I run? Does my body not understand that I try very hard to be good to it? SO WHY DOES IT PUNISH ME? Sigh.

I sometimes tell people how much I weigh. And they say this, "Oh. Well, you don't LOOK it."

I can almost hear the cringe in their voice. Like, "Huh. Wow. You heifer." So it's hardly a compliment. Because I accept compliments as readily as I accept the zits that take over my chin every time I get my period.

Is this all more information than you needed tonight? I apologize. But I feel better, so thanks.