To clarify.

No, I am not moving out of the state. No, I did not become a vegan, nor am I joining the circus.

I will still feed and love and snuggle The Cats on a daily basis, they will just live with grandma temporarily. My grandma, not theirs.

I am not crazy.

Yes, you can send me flowers.

Yes, I will be in my parents' hot tub every day. Hi, Mom!

No, you probably can't come, too.

No, Jeremy did not move to Saudi Arabia. He'll be there.

We have co-ownership of Ozzie. Thanks in advance, Mom. I always wanted a dog...

If you know where I'm going, and know of any jobs, feel free to get me one.