The Olympics have replaced The Food Network and Brewers games in my life. I cannot stop watching them. Every night is the same: all of a sudden it's 11:30 and I've got my hands twisted around a blanket with nerves or I'm sniffling during a medal ceremony. SO ADDICTING.
And the commercials make me cry, FYI. Seriously. The one with the track race, and the guy who falls, and his dad walks him to the finish line? Weeeeeeeeeeep!
So now let's talk about synchronized diving. First of all, what? Synchronized diving? When did that happen? I mean, it's cool, but, what? The female commentator during this event is awful. Everything is "pretty."
"Well now, synchronized diving is about pretty. I mean, you need your dive to be pretty."
"Oh, look at that! His entry was just pretty!"
"Uh oh, uh oh. Now, that was ugly. You really need to be pretty with your dive in this sport."
STOP SAYING PRETTY. STOP! And this was during the men's dive! I'm certain these divers don't want to be synonymous with the word pretty. I'm sure they'd rather hear strong or solid or GOOD. Good is better than pretty.
And now Michael Phelps. Good looooord. He's good. There's not much else to say about him. But maybe I'll call him pretty for good measure.
Gymnastics is always my favorite part. Al-ways. I would kill to have an ass like a gymnast. Those girls are solid.
And lastly, volleyball. I don't care much to watch it, but I did the other night. It was the U.S. women's team, and during a spike one of the women lost her wedding ring. It flew off into the sand, quite an ordeal. I'd be mortified. Luckily, it was found.
However, later in the day a newscaster was replaying the situation, and actually said, "We talked to Kerri Walsh about just what was so important about that gold band."
WHAT? Just what was so important? Oh, I don't know. Maybe because it was her WEDDING RING, you idiots.
Oh, the Olympics. You've got to love them.