Newbie.

I remember the exact moment I understood the game of football. I was at a Green Bay Packers game with dad years ago. I asked a lot of, "What does that mean?" "Who is that guy?" And, "How many points is a touchdown?" questions, and dad answered them. I'm sure he probably also asked God why he had two daughters instead of just one son. Just one. Really, God?

But alas, I learned. And after that game, I understood. Football became a whole new game. Like, it actually became a game. Because before it was an excuse for people to yell at the television and wear Brett Favre jerseys. Not that I was one of those people. Cough.

I feel similarly about baseball. Don't get me wrong, I understand baseball. Baseball sort of makes me yawn, but I get it. I call myself a Brewers fan because I feel I need to be loyal to Wisconsin. That, and I have a hat. And I like it. Plus Miller Park is pretty neat, and tailgating is fun.

However, I don't follow baseball. I don't know the players. I've heard the names JJ Hardy (Squeal! Swoon! Sigh! Or whatever else the girls do) and Ryan Braun (RyBrau?), and I know who Ned Yost is. But I didn't even know until yesterday that Geoff Jenkins was no longer a Brewer. And what the hell happened to Richie Sexson?

Yes. It's been that long since I paid attention.

But yesterday I educated myself, dammit. I sat down and I watched the game. I even cheered at the appropriate moments. I learned that Ben Sheets is a pitcher and that Prince Fielder is a little big-boned. Ryan Braun looks Ethiopian to me and Corey Hart is this-close to getting voted into the All Star game. And Bill Hall, whose hot tub I've seen (and it's very dirty, FYI), goes by "Billy."

I've been told that every Brewers fan needs to have a favorite Brewer. I tend to be leaning toward the Polish sausage, but I'm open to suggestions.

I am a Brewers fan in the making, people.