Just some things I needed to get off my chest.

My friends and I are sitting in the movie theater Tuesday night watching "Hood to Coast" (which was a fantastic documentary, by the way, about the epic relay race of the same name). A group of fully-grown adults (as opposed to partially grown? Yes, perhaps) sat behind us the ENTIRE time, absolutely GUSHING over every scene. OH MY GOD, I REMEMBER THAT!






No. No, I'm not exaggerating. Ask anyone. It's a true story. Clearly - CLEARLY! - this group of people had run Hood To Coast before. Which, you know what, that's awesome. It really, really is. After watching the documentary, I'd give a limb to run that race. (OK, probably only a fingertip. But only because I don't handle pain well. But still). But it was so evident that they needed EVERY. SINGLE. PERSON in that theater to know it.

It was obnoxious. It was rude. My eye-rolling was audible by the end of the movie. Literally, I turned around, looked at them, rolled my eyes, and told them to shut up. I had to. Shit. I wanted to HEAR the movie. Enjoy it. I don't give a shit if you ran Hood To Coast EVER in your life when I'm trying to watch a movie about it.

So next time you're in a movie theater, shut the hell up.

Which brings me to rant No. 2 of the day. On that same evening, while parked in a parking lot after a particularly frustrating, mind-boggling drive across town at rush hour during a snowfall, I sent this tweet: "Goddamn people. It's an inch of snow. Get a grip and drive (Shhh, I'm parked)."

I was, at that point, literally gripping my steering wheel and bashing my head into it. It had been a stressful drive. People were driving like lunatics, both too fast AND too slow. Minutes later I get a reply from a Twitter personality I've never come across before. It was actually a DJ at a Milwaukee radio station I used to listen to ALL.THE.TIME. (And now never will SOLELY because of this dickbag). (Yes, I'm looking at YOU, 103.7 KISS FM).

This guy, after calling me "fastlane," tells me to slow down. That whatever I'm hurrying to get to ("probably a garbage bag full of Fritos on the couch," he says) can wait.

WHAT. Excuse me? And by "excuse me," I mean "fuck you." What pissed me off most about his asinine reply was A) that he's never interacted with me ever before, but then B) comes at me to accuse me of going home to eat a garbage bag full of Fritos on the couch.

I wanted to stab him, I kid you not. STABBY.

The rest of the interaction goes like this:

Me: "Yeah, ass, I was rushing home to my Fritos."

Him: "good one"

Me: "Jesus. What the hell is your problem? Carry on."

Him: ... something about me being a Cyborg (I don't remember the exact words, and I can't get to the tweet now).

Such a ridiculous interaction, but it left such a bad taste in my mouth. I HATE this guy. I don't even know who he is. Actually, yes, yes I do, as far as "radio personalities" are concerned, but what the hell? I hate people behaving like jerks solely for the purpose of being a jerk.

SORT of like that one time I tweeted that my shoes were squeaky, which resulted in a diatribe about the proper use of Twitter, YouTube video, and all.

And THIRDLY, because I need to discuss everything that's wrong with the world in one, incoherent blog post, there's this PERSON. This woman. Who exists. Her sole "purpose," she says, is to inspire! And make the fitness world a better place! And rainbows! And puppies! And fight obesity! On the outside, it's great. Good cause. Good purpose. A little over-the-top and annoying, but, you win some, you lose some. She likes attention. A LOT of it. That's very evident. Self-promoter. Etc. People know who she is. She makes sure of it.

The other day, after posting a final note on Dailymile (look at me! look at me!) that said she would no longer be posting her workouts on Dailymile anymore (No, really! Look at me! Ask me why! Let me direct you to my blog so I can get more HITS!), she said in a message to a pal that Dailymile just isn't for her. That it's not for "serious athletes." That most of the people on Dailymile don't know what a "real workout" is.

And that is when my head actually exploded. FRAUD. You are a fraud, you! You... PERSON. Who's a fraud! To say those things about a (really rather INSPIRING group of active people) group of people who use that site to log their workouts and encourage and inspire those they interact with, when you SAY your own mission is to "inspire," does nothing for your credibility but out you as a fraud. Because you know what, lady? Dailymile is full of athletes who are serious. Athletes who could kick your ass in ANY race you set out to do. A-N-Y. Athletes who know what a real workout is because they put their minds to it, even if it's walking around the block.

So. So you know what? SHUT UP. *sticks out tongue* I don't like you.

<stomps away>