Innernetz, we need to talk.

The most devastating thing that I didn't even know happened happened, you guys! It's all the internet's fault. It tried to separate and destroy two inseparable and indestructible forces! Once upon a time there was a girl named Lesley. Lesley was super awesome and bloggy. I liked Lesley. I liked her blog. She was a runner and neato and I wanted to be friends with Lesley of Colorado. We became friends on the interwebs because that's what weirdo people like us do. Soon it carried over into Facebook. And Twitter. And every other social media outlet known to mankind.

LESLEY & KRITTABUG 4-EVER.

A couple years ago she was in MY city. She ran the marathon here. As she ran past the aid station I was working, we squealed, hugged and snapped a photo. WE MET. For just a brief moment. And it was monumental.

As time passed, we continued to be LESLEY & KRITTABUG 4-EVER on the internet.

It'd been a while, but last week we started interacting with each other on Twitter. I remember thinking, "Gosh. Where has Lesley been? I feel like it's been forever." But nonetheless, we chatty-tweeted.

AND THEN. And! Then! She says, "Hey, can I ask, how and why did we become disconnected on the Internet?"

WHAT. Question mark? I didn't know what she meant. I panicked and checked. I WASN'T FOLLOWING HER ON TWITTER. SHE WASN'T FOLLOWING *ME* ON TWITTER.

WE WERE NOT FOLLOWING EACH OTHER ON TWITTER ANYMORE!

When did this happen?? HOW did this happen?

I immediately, without passing Go! or collecting $200, clicked "follow" on her Twitter profile. I also checked to make sure I was wearing deodorant and underwear, because WHY WASN'T I FOLLOWING HER? Had I lost my mind? I then did the next reasonable thing I could think of -- ran RIGHT over to Facebook. And. GASP.

WE WERE NOT FRIENDS ON FACEBOOK ANYMORE.

Before I had a chance to have a complete meltdown, she sent me a friend request. All was complete again. Complete, but made no sense at all. Apparently at some point over the summer, I unfollowed her on Twitter, which, kind of breaks the cardinal rule of honest-to-goodness friendships. An unexplained unfollowing is like a slap in the face. And my friend Lesley of Colorado felt slapped.

Lesley & Kritt... blerrrgghhh... splat.

However, I did NOT unfollow her. At least, not knowingly. Ever.

She spent months wondering what she did wrong and why I was such a snot. Meanwhile, I carried on reading her blog and smiling, happily unaware that the Internet was stomping on kittens and ruining lives. Until today, months later, when after a few exchanges on Twitter, she finally asked.

We've spent a solid 20 minutes catching up on months lost. Realizing all we've missed in each others' lives. You know, conversations about pizza. And running. And my new tights. And her new floors. LOOK AT WHAT WE HAVE, INTERNET. You can't keep that apart!

We've vowed never to unknowingly, and without just or reasonable cause, break up again. If you felt an overwhelming sense of peace and calm today while sitting at your desk, it's because the world is right again. Duh.

And internet, you're on my shit list.