I'm so thirsty, and other unimportant stories.

I am in a constant state of thirst. After every run, I seriously spend the next 97 hours guzzling anything within reach. With exceptions, of course. I mean, I once considered guzzling the can of carpet cleaner, but decided better. In the last hour I've chugged a bottle of Muscle Milk, followed by a bottle of Vitamin Water, and I'm still thirsty. Only now I want to puke because I've drank too much. VICIOUS CYCLE.

Then I'll spend the next day peeing. All day. In case you were wondering. Welcome to my life. Drink, pee, repeat.

I also thought I'd share with you the exciting news that in August I actually get to move into a one-bedroom apartment. Please remember I'm currently in a studio apartment with approximately 4 feet of space and two cats. (Cat Lady, meow). So the fact that I'm going to have a home with a bathroom that's NOT part of my bedroom/living room, and also a bedroom door, is phenomenal. If you only understood just how excited I was to have a BEDROOM DOOR, you'd piss yourselves right now. I don't even remember what it's like to be able to walk into another room. Because that's all I have right now. A room. Singular. If you danced the Hokey Pokey up in this hole, you'd put your right foot into the kitchen, and when you pulled your right foot out you'd be in the bed.

Moral: don't Hokey Pokey here.

Other things you should know: I bought Glee: The Music, The Power of Madonna, and I've listened to it so many times I can sing all the lyrics backwards. It's redonkulous. I love-it-so-much, and I don't even like Madonna. Also, I'm running half marathon No. 12 this weekend, and my favorite color is purple.

That concludes tonight's episode of Useless Bullshit. Happy Thursday, loves.