A little chit chat.

I need to know who has been keeping Whole Foods a secret from me for my entire life. I walked into that place yesterday and about died and went to expensive grocery store heaven. How many places can you purchase fresh sea food, a pair of Crocs, a pricey floral arrangement AND a Runner's World magazine? I mean, really. It was so... magical.

MOB said the seafood department is like going to Sea World. It's SO TRUE.

Would you like a lobster? Oh, OK. Here you go! Let me just catch one for you in this elaborate sea aquarium we have right here.

Mind-blowing.

I didn't really have a purpose for going to Whole Foods yesterday, other than to get in on the secret. And to buy a canvas grocery bag for future grocery shopping adventures. I'm telling you, my carbon footprint is diminishing by the second. I'm so trendy and green.

(Except for the part where I DROVE to Whole Foods because at the last minute I decided I was too lazy to walk the 1.3 miles to get there).

I may have also purchased organic pizza rolls and strawberry sorbet, but that's because such food is my weakness. And I tell you, organic is quite delicious. But you can't really screw up pizza, I suppose.

And what else?

OH. I had a moment with my editor this morning, and decided I don't really want to shove my head into a meat grinder. It's not so bad. I think they realized I was thrown to the wolves, and they've finally reeled me to safety and started at ground zero. I lost a limb, or two, and an eyeball (pesky wolves), but I will be just fine.

Also know that my MS Ride is this weekend. Remember? 175 miles of bike riding in two days? Oy. If you need me next week, I'll be the girl walking (in heels!) as if she has an entire county shoved up her... you know.

BethJ is my resource for all of this madness, and is the reason I'm doing it at all. (FYI, BethJ, my rear end is thanking you in advance).

I e-mailed her yesterday with a barrage of questions. What do I need? Help! What do I wear? Is my butt going to bleed? What do I eat? What do I drink? Will I ever be able to have children after this?

You know, questions like that.

She replied quite eloquently with answers that included exactly how to apply butt balm to avoid chafing ("I will provide butt balm for us, however, I will not apply your butt balm"), how to utilize sanitizing face wash to keep your, uh, other places sanitary for 175 miles ("do not apply on the actual coot, but arooound and neeeear it. Kinda like, do not apply eyeliner IN your eye, but arooound and neeear it"), and how to properly wash your bike shorts after the first day's ride so they're ready for Day No. 2 (I will not get into the actual conversation we had about this, as it included the phrase "smelly cave," and I just will not go there, you understand).

And, so, that's what I'll be doing all weekend. Neat, yes?

That's really all I have to say at this moment in time. Good day, my friends. Run along, prosper.